My daughter's car was showing a low tire alert this week. I did not pay much attention to it because it would often light up when nothing was wrong or if there was a sudden change in air temperature. This morning, I left to go get gas and pick up some lunch for us. She was going to have to leave for work about the same time I would be returning. When I got out of my car in our driveway, I walked around to take a look at the tire on her car that the car computer was showing was low. Overnight, it had gone completely flat. I had already had a busy morning. I had just spent two hours at the car dealership with my car getting the oil changed, tires rotated, and a few other things checked. I had been strong all morning and had handled all of the necessary business without any tears, just the usual heaviness and sadness. When I saw the tire, I felt myself suddenly losing all of that control. I realized that I did not have Michael to call for help. No matter where he was or what he would have been doing at the moment, he would have given me the time and would have said, "Babe, I'll take care of it and call you right back." Not that I am not capable of handling it, it was just something that he would have handled. I prayed out loud asking God who should I call. Immediately, Tim's name came to mind.... one of Michael's close friends. He and his wife, in addition to a circle of other close friends, have been available to me nonstop these last 9 weeks. I called his cell phone, and, even though he was in a meeting, he answered. I could not hold in the tears any more and began to cry. Through the tears, I told him it was just a flat tire and I did not know what to do. He immediately said he would take care of it. He called me right back to tell me that someone was on the way and he would be here shortly to check on it himself.
The truck showed up in less than ten minutes and the man brought everything he needed to fix it or put on a spare. He fixed the tire, which had a screw bit stuck in it, and checked the air in all of the other tires. By the time Tim got there, the job was done and the workman was gone. Tim came in and I cried some more. We talked about car stuff and he renewed my AAA membership for me, which had just expired this month. He helped me walk through what to do if I ever have anything happen again and am not around home. I was so thankful for this dear friend and for his willingness to help me in such a weak moment.
It was just a flat tire. My brain completely shifted into neutral and I did not know what to do. Michael and I were both good at doing something when there was an established system. We had systems to our marriage. There were certain areas that he handled and certain areas that I handled. Not that either of us were not able to operate the other person's systems, we just had smooth agreements of which responsibilities fell to which person. That is what made us a good team. Car issues were never in my world, until today. Having to suddenly face a task that had always clearly been in his world, sent me into a fresh state of missing him. He was not there to call for help.... but God..... He heard my prayer and directed me to the right friend who was able to handle it at that very moment. The daily tasks of life, that are seemingly no big deal, are a big deal. I am slowly learning all of his systems for the responsibilities that he had taken off of me and now are on my plate. The plate is getting larger. God is enabling me by His power and His grace. This is my reminder... I am more than a conqueror through Christ... through Him who loved me. (Romans 8:37)
My Life in Bullet Points
12 years ago
1 comments:
April 29, 2011 at 6:28 AM
You are, indeed, more than a conqueror because scripture declares it. I encourage you, as I encourage myself, to truly, truly, truly meditate on that. My we receive the Rhema Word regarding that subject. It will take us through, as that conquering power extends even beyond the grave.
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